Men need emotional support too.

By Oluwatomi Peters,        

Psychotherapist 

Men need emotional support too.

Sometimes a man says, "I'm fine," when he's actually struggling.

Sometimes what looks like anger isn't really about anger.

Underneath the anger may be 

• hurt.

• Rejection.

• Fear.

• Shame.

• Disappointment.

• Feeling ignored, disrespected, or not good enough.

But many men were taught to hide these emotions.

• "Don't cry."

• "Be a man."

• "Toughen up."

• "Handle it yourself."

So instead of saying, "That really hurt me," they may become angry.

Instead of saying, "I'm scared of losing you," they may become distant.

Instead of saying, "I feel like I'm failing," they may shut down.

This doesn't mean anger should be used to hurt or intimidate others. Men are still responsible for how they express their emotions.

But understanding what is underneath the anger can be the beginning of healthier emotional expression.

Men deserve a safe space to say:

• "I'm hurting."

• "I'm overwhelmed."

• "I'm scared."

• "I don't know how to deal with this."

Emotional strength isn't pretending you don't feel anything.

Sometimes real strength is being honest about what you're feeling and learning how to handle it in a healthy way.